Credits


The Way We Were Elements by Seatrout Scraps https://gallery.gingerscraps.net/showgallery.php?ppuser=13119&username=alannabanana


Tattered and Torn by Seatrout Scraps https://store.gingerscraps.net/Tattered-and-Torn-Collection-Tattered-Kit.html


Faith,Hope and Love Collection - Hope Kit by Seatrout Scraps https://store.gingerscraps.net/Faith-Hope-and-Love-Collection-Hope-Kit.html


Carefree Collection by Seatrout Scraps https://store.gingerscraps.net/Carefree-collection.html


Sweet Dreams Baby by Seatrout Scraps https://store.gingerscraps.net/Sweet-Dreams-Baby-by-Seatrout-Scraps.html


Project Me: Sweet Love - Collection by Cornelia Designs -Stitches


https://store.gingerscraps.net/Project-Me-Sweet-Love-Collection-by-Cornelia-Designs.html


Journaling Reads: 


I was in a long relationship that wouldn’t end my partner was abusive and life with him became unbearableI waited for him to change but of course this did not happen if anything life became worse. I would often wonder if  this was it, and what  had I done to deserve this miserable life.I kept praying for strength and then one morning I woke up and decided I could not bear to live like this another day and I left my partner. By chance I bumped into a male friend I had known a long time through friends and we started dating. I laid my cards on the table and told him I wanted it all…marriage children, a family life and if that was not part of his future then we had better separate now. I was lucky he wanted the same as me and we were married within 6 months and decided to start a family.


 But  my struggles had just began but with one big difference they were shared as my husband and I faced them together. For the next six years we tried every option available to have a child. I prayed everyday many times over in those 6 years and my prayers were answered Before we even started IVF I found outI had an endometrioses cyst in my ovary and had to have surgery to remove it. My fertility rate had just been halved. This also set us back a year. So anyways we went to see the specialist at IVF and the prognosis was not good. They gave us a 2 percent chance of becoming pregnant. I would not be deterred and told them as long as there is hope however small we are going for it and so we were booked in for our first cycle.


 Well my first cycle did not go well, there were problems with the procedure to collect the eggs and I was rushed to hospital with asphyxiated pneumonia. I remember just looking at the back of my hand to see how many eggs they had retrieved, 2 little eggs which had to be fertilised and put back into the womb in 4 days. How would they like all the antibiotics that I was pumped full with and would I be healthy enough, these werethe thoughts going through my head as the tears fell down my face while laying on the hospital bed!


The 1 egg that fertilised did not take and we had to go through the procedure again as I had no eggs to freeze. We were heartbroken but remained focused and booked in again. That year my brother passed away unexpectedly, more heartbreak. He was my hero and my friend! So we tried another 4 times, only collecting 2 eggs at a time and fertilising one, the second time the egg didn’t fertilise but the 3rd time it did and we became pregnant. I cannot put into words the feeling of joy when I heard those words for the very first time You are pregnant ..BUT 


and then time stood still for a few seconds and the joyful feeling ebbs away. We end up having a miscarriage and then another, so emotionally devastating We are told by our IVF specialist this time is the last, she sees the emotional toll it has taken on us but my head says we have one last chance. We again only have 2 eggs and then something wonderful happened both eggs fertilised and we now have double the chance, 2 weeks later I  get the most wonderful call. We are pregnant!! I can hear the embryologists joy in her voice as she tells us. There is no dreaded “but” We are so happy. Life is good , life is awesome. We are pregnant!!  From then on everything goes perfectly and 41 weeks later we have our little princess..our little miracle


Life is perfect