Kit: Clever Monkey Graphics:
Reggae Time
https://store.gingerscraps.net/reggae-time-by-Clever-Monkey-Graphics.html
Temp: Heart strings scrap art: Thoughts Templates I turned this one on its side
Journaling says:
Emma was diagnosed with cancer in February. Leading up to the diagnosis was one of the
worst times in my life and really my entire family’s life. So many tests, so many doctors visits. Being scared, not knowing anything, completely and utterly unsure of anything that was going to happen. Your body is in this constant state of fight or flight. So many mixed emotions from hysterical crying, to complete and utter rage that none of this is real and all just some kind of bad nightmare. As much as I knew chemotherapy would be the absolute worst treatment for my daughter and all the horror stories you hear from others who have walked this road I myself couldn’t wait for it to begin. I wanted cancer to be out of my daughter. I wanted to feel like we were doing something to stop cancer from winning! I also wanted normalcy back in our lives even if it meant going to clinic once a week at least the unknowns and constant testing and random doctors’ appointments would be over and we would be doing something!
At Emma’s first appointment she asked the doctor for a prescription for medical marijuana. I am a huge anti-drug person. I have always hated drugs and the idea of drugs. I could never understand why anyone would want to partake in something that would make you feel “weird.” Heck I don’t even like to get “laughing gas” at the dentist for any reason! I knew however that marijuana might be the only thing that actually makes my daughter feel any kind of normal and might actually help her with the nausea that chemotherapy brings to you.
I will never forget the day that I took her into the shop. I have never been inside of a marijuana shop and I never in a million years would have thought I would go into one. We walked in. They made us stand in a corner while they checked to see if her prescription was legit, even though marijuana has been legalized here in Washington State, you still have to be 21 to be inside the store. Once they confirmed her prescription a nice guy who was very helpful assisted us. We told him the reason why we needed it and that my daughter has stage 4 Hodgkins Lymphoma. He pointed out the things he thought would best help her with pain and with nausea. He looked at me and he asked me, “are you okay?” As soon as he asked me this I broke down into tears. I have been trying so hard to stay strong for my daughter and not let her see my emotional state but here in the middle of this marijuana shop, having to have my 18 year old child be subjected to something that neither she nor I believe in and buying my daughter drugs was the tipping point for me. I told the guy no not really but that I would be okay. We purchased a few tinctures and some gummies, paid in cash as you do and walked out the door. My daughter apologized to me for having to take me into a shop that she knows I am strongly against and I told her that she NEVER needs to apologize to me for something that is necessary for her to survive through cancer. I apologized to her for losing my composer in the shop and then we drove off to yet another one of her what seemed like at the time, never ending tests. #FUCKCANCER!
